new care

Well, here we go for another round.  Mom is gone,  Dad is gone - now I watch my husband's fight with diabetes take away the man that I married over forty years ago, the father of my two adult children.
His struggle with diabetes has been a long one, largely ignored by him for many years.  One year, in fact, he adamantly refused to take any drugs and lied to his doctor, ate anything he felt like eating and drank as much pop as he liked.  During that year he passed out at work a few times, was irritable with everyone around him and argumentative about his decision not to control his diabetes.
That was more than ten years ago but the damage was done.  At only 64 years of age he has been diagnosed with dementia.  I have seen this coming for some time and although not at all happy with the diagnosis I found it to be a validation of what I thought.  He has been tested by nuerologists and tomorrow will have a test to see if he has a tumor.  The tests are to determine what type of dementia he has, so far it is classified as vascular.  This is the second most common type of dementia and the hardest to medicate or control.  If the tests determine it to be alzhiemers (which I doubt) he can take some of the drugs that my Mom was able to take, I pray that he does not have the Parkinsons disease that my mother suffered from, we shall see.
Never one to have any hobbies or interests in things around him he now sits in front of the tv for about fifteen hours a day.  His main purpose in life seems to be taking care of me, which is fine but not really neccessary.  I never set an alarm clock, he makes sure that he knows what time I have to get up each day - sometimes checking with me several times a day.  My coffee is always on the table next to my spot on the couch.  My car is always warmed up on cold winter mornings.  The dishes are washed each day - the sink is not scrubbed nor the counters wiped but there are no dishes in the sink.
I truly wish there was more in his life, that he would/could take true pleasure in things around him.  We recently adopted a nine year old Bishon Fries that absolutely adores him.  She has been a God send and I am very glad she is here, I forget who rescued who when I see the two of them play together.  She doesn't get her feelings hurt when his mood swings turn mean.
Today we had our two grandsons whom he loves very much and our great nephew and he was so crabby I could barely stand it.  He can not handle the noise that three young boys make.  The change in his routine (watching tv in a quiet house) can be very upsetting to him.
As much as I do understand he does not help the chaos when the boys are here and he makes me angry, some days I just wish he had some place to go or some thing to do out side the house.  Most of the time I just try to cherish him and the time we still have.